Heartmas Rush
by Zdood
Summary: Heartmas (read: Christmas) is here, and Nep has found something to fear! A present for Noire she still has yet to get, and so she must obtain one or else be riddled with regret! However, forces are conspiring against her this Heartmas Eve; will the goddess be able to get through this without having to grieve? Also, what's up with this gimmicky rhyming summary?


Disclaimer: I own approximately nada.

AN: The good news? Here's another holiday special for y'all. :D The bad news? Y'all are gonna hafta wait a bit longer for the next chapter proper. :/ With any luck the main story will get updated soon, though.

But, in the meantime, enjoy, doods!

-XO[]/\-

OWP Special – **Heartmas Rush – **Start!

-XO[]/\-

The winter season, a time of magic, fun, and wonder. Snow falls, children play, and all await Heartmas day… huh, you don't know what Heartmas is? And you've been wondering what the hell it was ever since you saw the clearly made-up word? Well, I suppose that isn't all that surprising. Allow me to explain…

As I'm sure you all know, Gamindustri has no 'God' or 'Christ,' at least not in the way that we on our side of the fourth wall know them; hence why they have 'Heartmas' rather than 'Christmas.' It is, however, basically the same holiday, right down to businesses making oodles of money via the holiday shopping season; the primary difference is that, whereas we in our world celebrate God and Jesus and such, Gamindustrians celebrate their analogues of them – the CPUs of ages long past, such as Caelus.

"Awesomesauce! Christmas time is here, everyone! Time for presents~"

…Not that these sorts of distinctions really matter to certain people who can't be bothered to remember the existence of the fourth wall…

"Nep, leave the fourth wall alone and call the holiday its _actual_ name. Geez…"

"But whyyyy, Iffy? It's just gonna confuzzle people!"

"Give our readers some credit, will ya? Besides, half the stuff _you_ say is more confusing than a simple name change…"

"Oh, poo! Fiiiine!"

Much like the last holiday special, we start this little tale off in the kitchen of the Planeptune Basilicom, which was currently adorned with all manner of Heartmas stuff. Not a tree, though; that was in another room. It is Heartmas Eve, a bit in the afternoon. So close to Heartmas proper, the excitement in the air is palpable. In fact, if it were any more palpable, Neptune would probably be poking it with a stick and wondering what it was.

"It's just, like, I'm so uber-excited, you know? I mean, all those presents under the tree, but I can't open 'em 'till tomorrow… humbug! The wait's killin' me, Iffy!" Neptune began squirming around. If one didn't read what she just said, you'd probably think she needed to use the bathroom or something.

"I don't know why you're all that antsy when you've still got something to keep you busy." Iffy pointed out.

The ditz continued squirming. "Huh? What's that, Iffy?"

"Don't you still have to get a present for Noire? She _is_ your girlfriend, after all."

Nep froze, a look of horror on her face. "…_CRACKERS!_"

Ah, yes, you all probably need some exposition. Well, if you've been paying attention to everything else by this particular author (who still needs to update the main story of this little fanfic universe as of this writing… shame on him), then you know Nep and Noire are in a relationship. As such, our dashing (okay, not really) heroine Purple Heart wanted to be a good girlfriend and get Noire something nice for Heartmas, as the ditzy goddess was sure Noire would do the same for her (albeit she'd probably hide it behind her usual tsundere-ness). But, Nep being Nep, she tended to get distracted by other things… And of course, now it's Heartmas Eve…

…Yeeeah, Nep's turkey is cooked. Or do you readers have ham for Christmas? Well, whatever dish you gobble up for a Christmas meal, it's cooked for Nep… or is it?

The lavendette dashed out of her Basilicom, shouting, "See ya Iffy! I've gots me some Christmas shoppin' ta do! _Man_, I'mma lousy GF…"

"Call it _Heartmas_, damn it!" Iffy shouted after her, before sighing. "That girl…"

"Um, Iffy…" came a pitiable voice. IF turned around to find Compa, who appeared to have trapped herself in wrapping paper. I'm gonna hazard a guess that she'd been wrapping a couple of final presents.

The only sane woman sighed again as she went to help the nurse. "I really hope this doesn't become a Running Gag for you, Compa…"

-XO[]/\-

Having reached the bustling shopping areas of Planeptune, Neptune had slowed to a walk and started looking around. Don't get this action wrong folks, she was still very much in a hurry, just not quite as much of one as you'd think. You see, it wasn't so much that the ditz had forgotten _everything_ about the 'get a gift for Noire' thing; in fact, she'd actually decided on a gift long ago. She just kept forgetting to actually _buy_ the thing (ironic, considering she's actually already taken care of her other holiday shopping by now… lousy GF indeed…).

The gift she'd decided on? A box set of a rather old, classic magical girl anime that Noire had once expressed some interest (which she'd tried to hide) in one day a while back; she and Nep had been on a date ("Outing!" the tsundere would insist. Tsunderes are such silly creatures…), Lastation's goddess happened to notice the set in a window of a little shop, and her gaze had lingered on it _just _long enough for Nep to notice and realize something was up. She teased her fellow goddess about it afterwards of course, but the purplette kept the image of the box set in the back of her mind for later. Rather impressive, considering it's Nep.

Of course, as one might expect from the passage of time, the set that had been in that particular store was long since sold. So our heroine had to find another. The only problem with _that_, however, was that, being old and classic, this anime box set was both rare (it was quite frankly pure luck that the two goddesses had seen it that day) as well as expensive. Emphasis on 'rare;' Nep had saved up more than enough credits from beating up monsters to buy it. She just had to _find_ it first.

As to why Noire didn't buy it that day… eh, probably trying to preserve her image. She _is_ a rather proud tsundere, after all.

"Where to look, where to look…" the ditz wondered as she strolled through the brightly-lit streets (unfortunately devoid of snow… or perhaps fortunately, given Nep's attire of her regular ol' hoodie dress).

"…Ah-ha!" The goddess made her way into her first target, an anime (what else?) store. Nearby, a TV in the window of another store was playing a news report, hosted by a female NPC.

"…_there have been several sightings of the pests this year; they appear to be rather prevalent. Nowhere near as bad as six years ago, but still, keep watch, my fellow Gamindustrians, and hide your presents for your loved ones somewhere safe. Anyways, Merry Heartmas everyone. This is the Daily Convenient Plot-Relevant News Report, signing off for now. Please enjoy the classic animated special 'Rudy the Red-Nosed Horsebird,' coming up next!_"

-XO[]/\-

"Ah, man, they didn't have any…" Nep trudged out of the store dejected after having searched it from top to wherever-the-manager-got-fed-up-with-her-and-asked-her-to-leave. So she then made her way to the next store that looked like a good target.

"Nope."

And then the next.

"Nuh-uh."

Then the one after that.

"Bupkiss."

And after that.

"Nada."

And yet still a few more stores after that…

"Synonym for nuthin'…"

…Neptune knows what the word 'synonym' means?!

Erk- I mean, still more fine establishments after that… and yeah, you get the point. Seriously though, is anyone else surprised that she knows what 'synonym' means, much less that she can pronounce it?

Nep sighed, sitting on a bench after having gone through… let's see, add the three, carry the one… at least ten or eleven stores. Be glad that you didn't have to read through all that in excruciating detail.

"…Man, this is suxxors… I really wanna find that box set for Noirey…" The goddess scrunched up her face. "Think Nep-Nep, think! Where else could I look…?"

…Neptune can think? Nah, just kiddin' with ya.

However, what I'm _not_ kidding about is that quiet, but eerie giggling that seems to be coming from somewhere near Nep… rejects from the author's Halloween special, maybe…?

"Huh? Whozzat?" Nep jerked her head back and forth, looking for the source of the giggling, when –

CLANK!

"Oof! The hecksies?!"

The bench fell out from under our heroine, its legs busted, and she landed rather painfully on her butt. The giggling had faded, as well.

"Ah come on, I don't eat _that_ much!" Nep griped, before getting back up. "Anyways, I should prolly keep lookin'…" And so the lavendette went off to continue her search for that elusive box set…

Unbeknownst to the CPU, however, she was being watched by several pairs of eyes…

"_Hehehe… I think we can have some fun with this one!"_

"_Let's make her miserable!"_

"_Let's ruin her day!"_

"_Why, after you guys, you nasty old Scrooges, you!"_

"_hehehehehehe…."_

-XO[]/\-

As if it wasn't bad enough that Nep had yet to find her present for Noire, the universe had apparently decided to mess with her for giggles; the bench was merely the start of her misfortune this day, well, evening now…

First she got accidentally Justice Kicked by an errant Nisa, who'd been chasing a burglar. Stealing things on Heartmas Eve? The scumbag…

SMACK! "Ouchies!"

"I'm so sorry, Lady Purple Heart! I thought I was right on target, but it felt like something… _pushed_ me, or something!"

Not too long after recovering from that, a traveling cart with a bunch of merchandise on it barreled into her from the top of a slanted street.

CRASH! "Ack!"

Just after this, Gust, the owner of the cart, walked up to Nep. "Are you all right, Lady Purple Heart? Gust was sure she secured cart…"

And then after recovering from _that_, while walking down another street, a Fenrir ran her over, hit-and-run style.

SLAM! "Pain!"

Trailing after the Fenrir was Falcom, who had been attempting to deal with it after it had caused some problems in downtown Planeptune. She stopped to check on Neptune, however.

"Sorry Lady Purple Heart, I thought I had that thing cornered, but then it seemed like something spooked it, and it bolted… are you alright?

"…Oh… hunky-dory…" Nep mumbled, picking herself up the ground shakily and obviously rather beaten up. "Man, what's been up with my luck today…"

Falcom perked up. "Hm? Your luck?"

"Yeah Falky, it's been really sucky today! Well, after that weird thing with the bench and the giggling and stuff, anyway…"

"Falky?...Uh, anyway, what was that about giggling?"

"I heard some really creepysauce giggling, and then CLANK! The bench was busted an' I landed right on my putooey!"

Falcom raised a hand to her chin in thought. "Hm… Well, it _is_ that time of year… maybe you're being targeted by Grushes?"

"Targeted by whatnow?"

"Grushes. You know, gremlin-like monsters that only ever come out around Heartmas time to make people miserable?"

"Oooh yeeeah, those things… ah, crud! If they're after little ol' me…" Nep panicked a bit.

"Yeah, be careful, Lady Neptune. Those things are nasty pieces of work. Uh, anyway, I need to get back to dealing with that Fenrir. Merry Heartmas!" And the adventuress dashed off.

"Oh man…" Nep said, glancing back and forth warily. "I need to get mah butt movin'!" And she dashed off, hoping to get away from these 'Grushes' and get her present for Noire…

Now, you're probably wondering what a 'Grush' is. Well, it's as Falcom said – basically, a subspecies of gremlin that specializes in ruining people's Heartmases, only ever seeming to come out around that time. Presumably all the merriment in the air leaves a bad taste in their mouths or they feed on people's sorrow or somesuch; you'd have to ask Histoire to get the full scoop. They have a particular fondness for invading electronics and screwing them up, especially video games (though they're fine with anything, really). This is in fact how they get their name – after tampering with video games or other electronics and making them shoddy, those products afterward appear to suffer from being Christmas (or rather Heartmas) Rushed.

That all said, however, in some cases the products actually _are_ Christmas Rushed rather than Grushes being behind these incidents. Either way, though, Christmas Rush incidents in Gamindustri affect you readers' side of the fourth wall as well. Expect some glitchy-as-hell games in your world whenever Grushes are particularly abundant in Gamindustri…

Ahem, anyways, as Nep ran off, she failed to notice the sounds of snickering following her…

-XO[]/\-

Not too long later, we arrive at the scene of what appears to be a charity of some kind. It's bright and happy looking – very much so - and many gifts are being given out to children, who are leaving this building looking very joyous. The charity gave off a very, almost unnaturally, warm feeling. A young woman with long white hair (…I wanna say that's odd, but hey, Nep has purple hair, and Kei's hair is white…) and blue eyes walked out of this establishment, wearing a Santa hat and dress. This young woman glanced at her watch.

"Almost time…" she whispered to herself, before hearing something behind her. "Hm?" The woman perked up, and turned around to see…

"Oh my! Are you all right?"

"Ugggh…" None other than our heroine Neptune, who looked… rather worse for wear. Evidently she hadn't been successful in escaping the Grushes tailing her.

"I'll take that as a no…" the white-haired woman said, before picking up Nep and taking her into the charity building.

Nep's tormentors made to follow the two, but…

"_Heh? What's this?"_

"_Something seems to be stopping us…"_

"_What?!"_

"_Relax. It's no big deal. We can wait."_

"_Yes. We are patient."_

"_She can't stay in there forever…"_

"_Hehehehehehe…"_

-XO[]/\-

"…Oh, my achin' noggin'…"

Nep opened her eyes blearily, blinking them a few times. And then, "Huh? Where am I?" The goddess sat up and looked around, finding herself in a bed.

"You're in the 'Have A Heart-mas' charity building. I found you collapsed outside."

Nep turned to her right to see the white-haired woman from before. "Uh, thankies… who're you, anyway?"

"Oh, right. My name's Nicky. I run this charity."

"Well, likes I said, thankies. I'm Neptune!"

"Or rather, Lady Purple Heart, yes?" Nicky said wryly.

"Hehe, yeah… Anyways, I gots to get goin'. I gotta find a gift for someone…" Nep got out of her bed and prepared to continue her journey.

"Is it someone special?" Nicky asked.

"Oh, totallies. She's really special to me. The most specialest ever!" Nep said sincerely, nodding.

Nicky scrutinized the goddess for a moment, seeming to be trying to determine if Nep was being truthful. After a moment, she smiled. "Well, perhaps I can help. We still have some gifts left over, and it wouldn't do to let them go to waste."

"Oh, reallies!?" Nep exclaimed.

"Reallies." Nicky continued smiling. "Just whisper what you're looking for into my ear, okay?"

"Okie-dokie Nicky-wicky!" And so Nep did. After, "So, um… do ya have it? Prolly not, huh?"

Nicky giggled. It sounded oddly jolly. "Now now, don't get pessimistic so fast, my lady. I'll go look." And so the helpful NPC gal walked off into the back of the building.

While she waited, Nep decided to go wander around a bit. She wanted to see what was around this building. The Grushes were at the back of her mind right now. Oddly, it didn't seem to be because Nep forgot about them. It was more like… she felt somehow safe in the charity building… weird.

During her wanderings, she actually came upon some Horsebird stables.

"Woah. I wonder what they have these Horsebirds for…" There were quite a few of 'em, too. Nep didn't get the chance to count them, though, as Nicky returned.

"Lady Purple Heart!" She called.

"Oh, comin'!" And so the CPU ran back to where she came from to find a very-widely-smiling Nicky hiding something behind her back.

"Is this what you were looking for?" And she revealed that her hidden object was - !

Nep gasped. "No… way… you have it! You totally have it!" Yes, it turns out that Nicky had found the prized anime box set Nep had been searching for this whole story (which, admittedly, isn't exactly long…)! The goddess nearly shed tears of joy. You probably would too, if you'd had a day like Nep's and found this proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

"Well…" Nicky smiled. "Take it, my lady."

"You… you're just gonna let me have it?" Nep couldn't believe it. The thing had to have been worth thousands upon thousands of credits! And this gal was just gonna let her have it?

"Ah, c-come on, you silly willy. I'd feel all bad and stuff if I didn't pay for it…"

Nicky giggled her oddly jolly giggle again. "Come now, Lady Neptune. 'Tis the season, you know, and this _is_ a charity…" She placed the box set in Neptune's hands. "Take it. I insist."

The lavendette just gaped, staring at the thing in her hands with disbelief for a few moments. "Th…" she began, before nearly exploding with happiness. "THANKS! Thanks tons! Seriously, like, you have _no_ idea how grateful I am! This is so awesomesauce! _You're_ so awesomesauce!"

"Alright, alright," Nicky jollily giggled once more, "Now, don't you have some gift-wrapping to do?" The helpful NPC winked.

"Oh! Oh yeah!" Nep exclaimed, placing the box set in… either hammerspace or her inventory. Whichever. "Um, see ya, Nicky!" And then the goddess ran off, waving goodbye.

"Goodbye, my lady. Merry Heartmas!" Nicky said, waving back. As the goddess disappeared out of sight, the charity owner glanced at her watch again.

"Oh my, look at the time! I really must get ready…"

-XO[]/\-

"_Hehehehe…"_ the creepy giggling of the Grushes echoed, as Nep ran as fast as she could through the streets of Planeptune. She went through hell to get this present (mostly due to her tormentors), and she'd be damned if she let these little pests ruin her Heartmas gift!

And try to ruin it, they did their damnedest to. All sorts of things went wrong around Nep, ranging from street lights falling over to cars going out of control, as the Grushes tailing her began pulling out all the stops. Nep jumped, weaved, ducked, and whatever else she needed to do to avoid getting hit, as she too now began to pull out all _her _stops, short of going HDD, of course. Her precious gift for Noire in hand (well, inventory), the normally laid-back goddess' senses were now on hyper-alert.

As Planeptune's goddess leaped over a motorcycle that had been sent barreling her way, the Grushes seemed to start to get a bit irritated, and she could hear their incensed conversing.

"_Tch… bitch!"_

"_She wasn't like this before!"_

"_The little shit's determined to keep her pwecious wittle present safe, huh?"_

"_We'll see about that! Ruining a CPU's Heartmas… Think of the street cred we'll get! We __**can't **__pass this chance up!"_

"_Alright, let's play hardball…"_

A strange sort of… wave, or something, made its way through Nep as the gremlin-like beings finished their talking…

-XO[]/\-

…And the next thing Neptune knew, she was smack in the middle of a clearing in Virtua Forest!

"What the what?" Nep's gaze darted back and forth. Steeling herself and drawing her katana, the goddess shouted into the woods, "Okay, you annoyin' little gits! Get out 'ere and show yourselves like exhibitionists!"

… Nep knows what 'exhibitionist' me- ?! Er, ahem! Excuse me, getting off track…

"_Heh… sure, why not?"_ Came the echoing reply.

Not a moment or two later, they began showing up. 'Gremlin' really was an accurate way to describe them – they were short, had claws and pointy ears, and fanged grins adorned their faces. Their eyes glowed a sinister yellow. However, what differentiated these beings from their brethren was that, well… these creatures, the Grushes, were _transparent_, seemingly made out of the cold winter air itself, and appeared to fade in and out of existence sporadically. They were silhouettes, even, really, and their faces looked more like they belonged on a jack-o'-lantern than any sort of living creature… but then, maybe these beings are evil spirits…? Some of them _are_ floating…

Regardless, they showed up in droves; there were at least a dozen or more to Neptune's one. They chanted in an eerie unison, seeming to speak all at once even though they weren't.

"_Give us your gift, goddess gal…"_

"_Let us ruin your Heartmas…"_

"_One little destroyed holiday can't be that bad, can it…?"_

"Uh, yeah, no." Nep said ever-so-bluntly, moving into a stance and smirking. "And after all that bidness you guys put meh through, I kinda want a lil' payback, ya know?"

"_We'd like to see you try!"_ As one, the Grushes grinned, before one leapt at Nep. The lavendette retaliated by slashing at it, only to find…

"What the heck?! No effect?!" Neptune shouted as her blade passed harmlessly through the creature, before jumping away just as the Grush's claws touched her. The claws were cold to the touch – _deathly_ cold.

The Grushes snickered.

"_Come on lady, we're transparent…"_

"_Did you really think physical attacks would be that useful on us?"_

"_Uh, yeah, no."_

"_HEHEHEHEHEHE!"_

"Oh, crackers…" Nep began to sweat. Physical attacks didn't work... and she wasn't exactly great at magic. As I'm sure those who've played the games are aware, she is rather decidedly a _physical_ attacker, with few to no magical attacks whatsoever in her arsenal.

The Grushes grinned an evil grin, one that would make the Grinch himself proud.

"_Come on, girlie… We just want to ruin your gift and your Heartmas…"_

"_Give up your gift and submit to your sorrow and failure, and we will leave…"_

"Gimme an N! Gimme an O! What does that spell? _NO!_ You're off your nutty rockers!" Nep shouted, refusing to back down.

"_Sucks to be you then."_ Luaghing a cacophonous laugh, the Grushes began attacking Nep in small droves, never surging forward at once – toying with her, knowing that she couldn't hurt them.

A claw swiped at her, she jumped away. A blast of magic headed for her, she batted it away with her sword. Some of them leaped at her and she rolled out of the way.

"Alright, methinks I can't do much right now…" Nep mused as she jumped over a Grush that charged at her. "Hmmm… maybe if I transform and roll out?" She leapt back from a claw swipe. "…But all _that'd_ do is make me meatier. It wouldn't, like, suddenly give me uber-purifying-slashin' powers, would it? …It'd be so totally cool if it did, though!" She weaved her way around another couple of blasts of magic. "Maybe I should try an' hit 'em with their own magic? Nah, they'd just wise up and stuff, anyway…"

After much dodging and such, the Grushes went back to their ranks, and Nep got some respite.

"Man…" she panted, "Talk about a major nightmare before Christmas… Heartmas… oh, whatevs…"

"_You should know by know that your efforts are pointless…"_

"_C'mon girlie, just give up already…"_

"No means no, guys! I mean, I dunno what _else_ it'd mean, so it _must_ mean no!"

The Grushes just laughed. This girl was a fun little toy to play with.

…But they'd had just about enough.

"_Heh. Alright boys, NOW!"_

And as one, the swarm of ethereal gremlins launched a massive wave of magic too wide and too fast for Neptune to dodge.

"Ack!" She shouted as she flew back from the blow. She wasn't really all that hurt, but - !

"Snappers! Noirey's gift!" The blast had dislodged the present from her inventory; it now lay on the ground a few feet away.

Scrambling for it, she was impeded by a bunch of Grushes that got in her way, forming a wall.

"_Heh, not so fast."_

Nep stopped, and looked behind the Grushes hindering her to see another one land on the ground by her gift. It slowly sauntered up to the box set and grinned, before moving its claw, ever so slowly, closer and closer to the precious prize.

One touch was all it needed, and its foul magic would forever ruin the item.

"No…" Neptune said, a little weakly, her eyes just beginning to show signs of tearing up. Would all that effort, all that hell (mostly caused by these very monsters), be for naught…?

"_Merry f-ckin' Heartmas, goddess…hehehehe…"_ The claw was just about to touch the box set, hovering right above it - !

FLASH! "(Neeeigh!)"

"_GRAAAAAH!" _The Grushes shouted in agony as an extremely bright (and very warm, oddly) red light blinded them and seemed to… leave them in pain? Okay, dumb question, since I _just_ said they shouted in agony… The sinister beings went flying back as if struck, reeling from the light that had been accompanied by a horse's neigh, of all things.

Not long after, a small group of Horsebirds – nine, it looked like – ran into the clearing and positioned themselves in a protective formation around Neptune and her gift for Noire. And the last one to enter, seemingly the leader, had an… _interesting_… feature.

"…A red-nosed Horsebird?" Nep's eyes lit up. "Rudy!? For reals?!"

Yes, it was a red-nosed Horsebird, apparently the source of the light that left the Grushes in so much pain. Seemingly nodding in acknowledgement at Nep, it then unleashed another flash of light from its nose… wow, did I really just narrate that? That sounds… _really_ weird…

Anyways,

FLASH!

"_GRAAAAAH! TURN IT OFF, TURN IT OOOOFF!"_ The ghostly gremlins shouted in unison, preparing to retreat.

"_DAMN YOU! WE WERE SO CLOOOSE!"_

"_OUR CHANCE TO IMPRESS OUR PALS – GONE!"_

"_STUPID ANIMALS!"_

And with that final shout, the Grushes fled the scene, the flock of Horsebirds, save the red-nosed one, who stayed behind for a moment, in hot pursuit.

Whinnying, the docile beast nuzzled an amazed Neptune's cheek before following the rest of its group to chase the Grushes.

The goddess rubbed her nuzzled cheek. "Wow… Talk about a Heartmas miracle…" She then hurried over to her gift for Noire and put it back in her inventory. "Phew… hm, maybe I should get Histy to teach me some magic or sumthin'? Eh, I'll think about it." Shrugging, Neptune ran off to find her way back to her Basilicom.

-XO[]/\-

Not more than a few minutes later, our intrepid main character returned to the fancily-named church, and was greeted by IF, Compa, and Nepgear… who promptly took her to her bedroom to heal her after seeing the shape she was in. When asked what had happened, Nep had only this to say:

"Kuh-raaazy holiday shoppin' season, I tells ya! Also I got attacked by monsters."

A little while later, a bandaged-up Nep, who probably had to recover more from Compa's treatment than she did the Grushes' assault, made to wrap up her gift for her special someone.

"Man… what a day," She said, cutting some wrapping paper from a roll, "Totally worth it though." The goddess smiled, arranging the paper around her gift, then making to grab some tape. "And I got to actually _see_ Rudy the Red-Nosed Horsebird! Like, I totally thought he was just a character from that really old Heartmas special!"

However, this thought brought something to the forefront of our heroine's mind as she put down her tape and reached for a ribbon. "Oh. My. Gosh. Does that mean a certain jolly ol' elf is real, too?! That's so tubular!" And with that, her gift had been adorned with a nice little ribbon.

"Anyways… time to go hide this bad boy! I gots me a big day tomorrow!"

And so Nep went to hide her gift somewhere super-secret! In fact, it's so secret even _I_ don't know where it is, and I'm the more-or-less omniscient narrator! …Or maybe I just don't feel like revealing it yet. You decide.

And after Nep hid the gift, and made her way to bed, she dreamed nice dreams of eating lots of sugarplums and cookies, as bells could be heard jingling outside… wait, what?

What's this… far above Planeptune, in front of the moon… is that…?

"HOOOOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Well, cross my I's and dot my T's. It really is jolly ol' Santa Claus! Well, his Gamindustrian equivalent, at any rate, with Horsebird-drawn sleigh (led by none other than Rudy the Red-Nosed Horsebird) to match. Maybe he represents free giveaways or discounted prices of video games?

Strange, though… while that laugh was certainly jolly enough to belong to Santa, it seemed… oddly feminine. Is Gamindustri's Santa a bishonen? …Wait, what am I saying, this is Neptunia, there aren't any human(oid) non-silhouette non-villain guys (wow, that's specific) here!

…So Gamindustrian Santa Claus is female? Can't say I'm complaining…

-XO[]/\-

The next morning was a joyous one, for Heartmas had come! A smile was on the face of all, as the spirit of the season had them in its thrall!

In the Basilicom of Planeptune, we join Nep and her crew, who had invited their other friends over to have some fun, too! How they decided to meet at Planeptune's Basilicom, I know not, but to be completely honest I suspect it's due to ever-so-convenient plot!

Many a present was passed around, a gun from Gear to Uni, a game from Compa to Nep the loony! From Red, Iffy got a glomp and (denied) solicitation, and from Blanc Vert received much frustration and indignation!

Yes, many a gift was passed from one to another, some big and some small, but one gift we shall focus on in particular, as I'm sure you all recall. Nep's special something to Noire, that super-rare box set, our heroine now deemed it time to take her girlfriend and get!

So she lead her fellow goddess, down corridor and down hallway, until finally they came upon Nep's secret hideaway! And now that we have reached this point in this section's timing, I am quite thankful that I can finally stop rhyming! Seriously, do you know how difficult it is to do this style of narration, for line after line of description and declaration?! I mean, 'hideaway' doesn't even really fit that well with 'hallway,' as I'm sure you all realize, but I apologize, as I couldn't think of something better with which it could harmonize!

… (Cough!) Oh thank goddess… gimme a sec, let me spray some water in my mouth… ah, there we go. Now, where were we? Ah, right, Nep's gift to Noire.

"Okay Neptune, what did you want to show me?" Noire asked, crossing her arms. It was pretty obvious to her that the purplette was going to give her a secret present of some kind, but that said, you gotta give the girl credit for hiding most of her curiosity at what it was. Must come standard with years of tsundere-ism.

"Just a sec, my fair Noirey!" Nep said, rummaging through… a food cabinet? In… let's see, mostly lavender bed, a decently-sized TV and some video games, very messy… is this her room?

…Well, you have to admit, her own personal food cabinet in her messy-as-hell room _would _be a good place to hide something. Aside from few people being willing to sift through the mess, trying to take a Big Eater's food generally isn't exactly a good idea anyway.

"Aaaand… here we are!" Nep pulled out the prized item, wrapped in red and black wrapping paper (how fitting). Smiling, the ditz handed it to Noire.

"Hm…" Noire gazed upon the gift for a moment, before tentatively beginning to open it. If she were a little less tsundere, she would probably be showing her excitement outwardly. That is to say, she's pretty friggin' excited. Why, what could this gift her nutty girlfriend went to the trouble of hiding possibly be?

Finishing her unwrapping, she got a good look at her present, the black-haired goddess' eyes widened and…

"N…Neptune… Is… Is this really…?"

"You betcha, Noirey!" Nep beamed.

"How… How did you even manage to find this? I mean, do you have any idea how lucky we were to see it that one time? These things're nearly impossible to find…"

"Ha! C'mon Noirey, I don't even know the _meaning_ of impossible! Also I got really totally lucky."

…I find it hard to tell if she seriously doesn't know what 'impossible' means or if she's just joking. I mean, it _is_ Nep. There's probably a lot of words she doesn't know the meaning of like, I dunno, maybe 'fiancée' or something, for example... so it's _possible_ that she might be being serious here, right...?

…Too meta? Sorry, it felt as if a ghost had possessed me and had dominion over my typing as that was written. I mean, how many of you readers even got that? … Eh, I guess I'll just Throw It In. Seems way too forced though, yeesh.

"W-Well, in any case…" Noire began, blushing, "Th-Thank you… B-But don't get the wrong idea! I – "

"Ah come on, Noirey," Nep said with a half-lidded gaze, "You're real cute when you're tsundere an' all, but could ya drop it like a bad habit just once?" Planeptune's goddess then broke out the ever-so-Game-Breaking Puppy Dog Eyes Of Doom ™ and added, "Pweeease?"

Noire hesitated for a moment, then said, "W-Well… we _are_ alone... Oh, F-Fine…" The tsundere took a deep breath, readying herself, "Like I was saying… thank you, Neptune… this is a really great gift… I love it." She held the hard-won gift close, and smiled a small, but very sincere, smile.

Nep grinned, and then glomped her fellow goddess. "Merry Heartmas, Noirey!"

"H-Hey!" Noire began, before suppressing her usual reaction, and, slowly but surely, returning Neptune's hug… while blushing up a storm, of course. I'd even say the levels of red in her face exceed 255 or even 256!

"…Hey, Noirey?" Nep asked.

"Hm?" Noire hummed.

Nep beamed. "Can ya call me 'Nep-Nep' just once, too?"

Noire paused for a moment… and then gave Nep a very soft bop on the head. "…Don't push it." She deadpanned, albeit in a rather affectionate manner, giving a half-smile the whole way.

"Aw…" Nep pouted, "Maybe next time, then."

"We'll see about that… " Noire broke the hug and took out a secret present of her own, giving it to the purplette. "And here… Merry Heartmas, Neptune."

Nep took the gift, lighting up like a Heartmas tree as she did so. "Thanks Noirey! You're such a radicalsyrup GF~"

"…Radicalsyrup?" Noire asked, just as puzzled as the rest of you, I'm sure.

"Yeah, radicalsyrup! It's like awesomesauce, but more sweet instead of spicy!" Nep glomped her fellow CPU (again). "Anyways, I'mma open it later, let's do some cliché romancey stuff first before the mood goes and kicks the can!"

"H-Huh, what?! N-Neptune, wai –"

GLOMP… yet again!

And so the two goddesses did various romantical stuff that would give one lots of warm, fuzzy feelings if they read it. Or possibly diabetes; it's pretty sugary and fluffy, like cotton candy, after all.

-XO[]/\-

…What? We're still going? We still have loose ends to tie up? Hang on, let me check the script… ah, here we are. Nep wanted to thank Nicky one more time for giving her that box set, it looks like.

And so we find our lavender-haired heroine inside the headquarters of the 'Have A Heart-mas' charity, looking for the helpful NPC.

"Heeey! Nicky-wicky, are ya in here?" Nep called, wandering around the building.

"Hm? Lady Neptune?" came the voice of Nicky, "I'm in the Horsebird stables!"

Nep smiled, heading over to the aforementioned area, to find the charity's owner feeding the Horsebirds.

"Heya girl!" the ditz said, walking up to Nicky, "I just wanted to thank ya again. Seriously, like, it was so groovy of you to give that box set to me…"

Nicky giggled her jolly giggle, smiling. "I take it you had a very Merry Heartmas then, yes?"

Nep beamed. "Oh, totallies! It was the bestest!" Nep then paused, before asking, "Oh yeah! Why do you have these Horsebirds, anyway?"

"Hm?" Nicky turned to face the goddess. "Well… they're handy for delivering things to people. And besides," she reached out a hand to pet the Horsebird next to her, "I just like 'em, you know?"

Nep stared at the woman for a moment, seeming to be attempting to connect some dots in her head, before saying, "Uh-huh. Um, hey, like, are you gonna be sticking around?"

Nicky shook her head. "No, I'm not. We only do business around winter time, and only for a certain timeframe, I'm afraid. We'll be packing up shop until next year soon."

"Aw, suxxorz," Nep pouted, "But… you'll be back next Heartmas?"

Nicky smiled. "That we will."

Nep nodded. "Okie-dokie artichokey! Well, see ya then!" And with that, Nep made her way out of the building, waving goodbye to the helpful NPC.

"Bye, my lady." Nicky said, waving back and watching Nep leave. A little after the goddess left, she turned her head to her left, smiling. "Kinda reminds me of Caelus in her earlier days… wouldn't you say, Rudy?"

The mysterious charity owner received a happy neigh, accompanied by a warm red glow, in response.

-XO[]/\-

And for one final scene, we return to the Planeptunian Basilicom, just outside of it to be exact, where it appears to have begun snowing lightly, just in time to add some ambiance.

Nep caught a snowflake on her tongue. "Mmmm… tastes like frozen chicken." The goddess looked around in wonderment. "Ya don't see snow 'round these here parts often."

"Well, the narrator did just say it's here to add some ambiance," Iffy said, the whole Neptunia gang gathered nearby.

Nep turned to the group, "Well guys, I say we wish all our adoring fans one last Merry Christmas! What do you say?"

Iffy gave her friend the Half-Lidded Stare Of Deadpanning ™. "I say the fourth wall would've liked to have received the precious gift of actually remaining intact this Heartmas…"

"Aw come on, Iffy!" Nep complained, "Just call it Christmas! I mean, we're gonna have to break the fourth wall for our final bit, anyway!"

IF sighed. "Oh, fine, I suppose. Anyway, get over here so we can get started."

Nep smiled, making her way to the group. "Righty-o, Iffy!"

Holding hands with each other, some willing and some grudging, the various heroines of Gamindustri, from big to small, major to minor, CPU to Oracle (I _did_ say the _whole_ gang. Just go with it), began to sing a little song. Enjoy, folks!

_We wish you a Merry Christmas_

_We wish you a Merry Christmas_

_We wish you a Merry Christmas_

_And a Happy New Year_

_Fun tales for you we bring_

'_Cause that's really just our thing_

_Good tidings for Christmas_

_And a Happy New Year_

_We hope you enjoy your Christmas_

_And have a Happy New Year!_

And finally, as one, "MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!"

"See ya around, peoples!" Nep waved.

-XO[]/\-

OWP Special – End

-XO[]/\-

**Nepedia Entries: Heartmas**

_Hello, everyone! Histoire here! (^ v ^) This is a little something the author wanted to start doing: Nepedia articles, hosted by me! I suppose I could use the extra screen time. (^ ^;)_

_In any case, these sections shall be devoted to explaining aspects of Gamindustri that crop up during the course of the 'Hyperdimensional Adventures' series and its attachments. In other words, I suppose you could consider it a manual, perhaps even a strategy guide, for them. ^ ^_

_This very first entry is devoted to 'Heartmas,' the Gamindustrian equivalent of Christmas and similar such holidays. As was explained early on, the two are really for all intents and purposes the same holiday; the only difference is that, whereas on your side of the fourth wall Jesus and God are celebrated, here in Gamindustri we celebrate the Goddesses of the past. As I actually personally knew many of them, this is really quite the nostalgic time of year for me. ^ ^ I fondly remember one time when a young Caelus squealed with delight when I gave her this cute little plushie as a gift. (sigh) If only the Deity Of Sin hadn't started to wreak havoc, I wonder… ahem, excuse me, I believe I'm getting sidetracked. ^ ^;_

_Well, I don't believe there is really anything else that needs explaining; Heartmas is really just the Christmas you all are familiar with under a different name, with our culture's divine beings instead of yours... I think I'm just repeating myself now. XD_

…_However, it __**is**__ probably worth noting that, yes, the Santa Claus in our world is indeed female; the narrator was correct on that. ;)_

-XO[]/\-

**Nepedia Entries: Grushes**

_And we have one more article for this installment! ^ o ^_

_In addition to aspects of Gamindustri, these articles will also delve into Bestiary entries for monsters that play large roles. The subject of this first one is, of course, this special's Big Bad, the Grushes! ^ ^_

_As already explained, these creatures are basically ghostly gremlins, and their names are derived from a portmanteau of 'Gremlin' (which they resemble) and 'Christmas Rush'(which they personify), alluding to their general behavior, which is to cause trouble around Heartmas time and more often than not tamper with electronic devices. They are nasty pests and can be quite malicious, but thankfully, they aren't always prevalent; their population from year to year is extremely sporadic. I do recall that there was a particularly bad infestation of them about six years prior to this writing, wherein they nearly ruined the reputation of one of Planeptune's most famous icons. Why they seem to revel in making people miserable is debatable; Gamindustrian scientists can't seem to decide whether it's because they're just doing it for fun or if it's because they feed on negative emotions. Personally, I think it's most likely both. ^ ^_

_Also, it has been noted that, although the word that officially makes up the first half of their name is 'Gremlin,' there are some other words that would fit just fine as well, such as 'Grief,' or 'Grinch.'_

_These beings are not terribly powerful on their own (though their deathly cold touch can be a problem) but in large numbers they are like a swarm of your Earthen army ants. They are fairly capable magic users, and physical attacks have no effect on their ghostly bodies. They are susceptible to magic however, and needless to say their battle with Neptune would have ended differently had she been much of a spellcaster (hm, maybe I __**should**__ give her some magic training…). They also detest warmness and light, and quite possibly strong positive feelings in general as well; exposure to these things puts them in great pain, and can easily ward them off. This is most probably why they like to hide in the shadows while stalking their chosen prey, only coming out into the open as a last resort._

_That all said, we here in Gamindustri will do our best to ensure that these little monsters don't cause too many problems over in your world. ;)_

-XO[]/\-

AN: …Hm, I don't think I got much to say here, really. You can expect those Histy-narrated Nepedia articles to start showing up every now and again from now on, though.

The circumstances surrounding this special are more or less the same as the Halloween one; ie didn't want to stick it in middle of arc so made it separately, etc etc. Also the timeline placing and canonicity of this special is (currently) ambiguous, just like the Halloween special.

…I really gotta get on with the main fic so I can find somewhere on the timeline to put these things. XD

Anyways, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, or what-have-you, everyone! :)


End file.
